Archive for the ‘Chow Down in London’ Category

If you've been to the South African restaurant called Chakalaka in Putney, you'll know how frickin awesome their chow is, and now finally for us Saffa's in Wimbledon, we no longer have to bust it on the dreaded District Line to get a good taste of South Africa, we've got it nicely tucked away right here in Wimbledon as part of the Horse and Groom Pub.

You may remember the previous raving review I did for Chakalaka in Putney some time ago, where I took on the 25oz Steak Challenge, so when I heard that another Chakalaka had opened up right here in Wimbles, I wasted no time in going to check it out. Once again my fussy little taste buds were mesmerized by the quality of the food. Now let me tell you, this time they were gonna have it a bit harder because to be quite honest, it was Sunday, so naturally I was hanging like a bitch after yet another weekend of insane debauchery in the life of Marky Mark. My taste buds were wrecked and even if I drank a whole bottle of thick bleach, it would still taste like Jack and Coke due to the inner layers of my mouth being well marinated all weekend, so all in all, it was gonna be tough for Mr. Chef Dude in the back. I decided to go for something a little lighter on my already tender tummy, so I had a look at the menu and went for the KingKlip with sweet potato and green beans… when I saw those veggies on the menu I could just hear my ma's voice in my head telling me to be sensible and healthy also I couldn't resist the sudden thought of quality nutrients to bring homeostasis back to my badly self abused body. 

When the food arrived I had a little skrik! The presentation was immaculate and that is one big point I'd like to note, it seriously looked like someone had sculptured every millimeter of surface area on that plate to be perfect… only for me to tuck right in and screw the whole lot up. The fish tasted like fish, but I don't mean the crap you get at your local fish and chip shop, this tasted like real fish, like fish should always taste, it was divine and took me on a little subconscious journey right back to SA and what our fish tastes like back there. Now comes the fun part, it was totally unexpected, I've never been a hectic fan of sweet potato or vegetables for that matter, as my ma will confirm, but call me deprived when I tell you I have never had sweet potato with a bit of cinnamon mixed into it, I am now a ridiculously huge fan, I couldn't believe how frickin awesome it tastes, I actually wanna have it made with something at home when I lock Chef Louise in the kitchen, and not let her out until she has made Darryn and I a good wholesome meal after a long hard days work The beans, oh the beans… lets just say if you told me that there was a vegitable patch outside in the back, I wouldn't be the slightest bit surprised, because those beans that I had there right on my very plate seemed to have come straight from that very patch, and to add to there awesomeness(my ma will go into absolute shock if she hears me saying this about green beans), they were marinating nicely in a delicious white sauce.

Chef Louise and Darryn came down with me this last Sunday evening. Chef Louise had the stuffed chicken breast which aparently tasted as divine as it looked and Darryn had the "all you can eat rib special" which I believe runs on Sundays and Wednesdays, so if you schmaak a ribs, £12.95 all you can eat… not bad hey.

Chakalaka is situated as part of the Horse and Groom Pub at 143-145 Haydons Road in Wimbledon [map], which mind you is also a nice little Saffa watering hole itself. Its owned and run by main man Miguel, who seems to be more than happy to provide awesome hospitality for Saffa's who stroll through his doors. I've heard alot of good things being spoken about the Horse and Groom recently since its had a change of management, and I'm quite looking forward to returning for a few pre-party drinks before hitting the late jols. If you looking to catch a couple of the Super 14 games when they are on Sky (else watch them online here at PharSide) then they are being shown at The Horse and Groom and at least with the main man being a Saffa himself, you know the rugby is going to get preference over some poncy soccer game.

All in all, I was definately impressed and recommend that you guy get your hungry little butts down there for an afternoon of good chow, good dops and good Rugby (that's if the Sharks can eventually pull their fingers out)

- Marky Mark

Did you know you can get a bunny chow in Wimbledon? I'm quite surprised at how many people don't know… and its right under your noses at Kafe Karahi… well right next door as you stumble out of the Walkabout.

Quite a while ago after a boozy night, Huncle and I decided to pop into Kafe Karahi for a curry. While we were standing there talking to the guys behind the counter, we told them they should start making bunny chows due to the high concentration of Durban locals in Wimbledon, because personally I'd pay good money for the delight. To our amazement, the dude behind the counter said that he had a bit of a surprise for us because he already sells them. Without any hesitation whatsoever, we ordered two for a test drive and sat patiently waiting for them drooling all over the place. When they arrived we chomped through them like there was no tomorrow, damn they were good… and so it began, the start of a constant weekly ritual of landing up at Kafe Karahi on a Friday and/or Saturday night at around 3am to fill our alcohol saturated tummies with a taste of Durban, to the extent that we're on a first name basis with the guys behind the counter.

Kafe Karahi is situated inbetween the Wimbledon Walkabout and Wimbledon Cabs right on the Broadway. The bunnies are very reasonably priced at a fiver a piece and my main man Umair will fill the loaf of bread with any curry of your choice. The Jen will usually go for a milder Chicken Tikka Masala Bunny not to scorch her tender lips whereas we'll usually go for a hotter Lamb Bunny, but be warned… if South Africa beat Pakistan in the cricket that day you're in for a surprise trust me hehe

The bunny chows are awesome, trust me, I wouldn't have been going there every weekend for about the last 3 years now if they weren't, they're that good, but if you're only feeling a bit peckish check out the rest of the menu as they've got a huge range of kiff chow on there, samoosa's and all!

These are the two bunnies that The Jen and I flattened on Friday night.

The Jen packing it in like a savage again

This is why I listen when The Jen speaks, trust me, you don't want to get a tighty from that hand

- Marky Mark

Marky Mark comes head to head with a 25oz… yes a 708g monster steak at Chakalaka in Putney

On Thursday evening myself and The Jen were invited by some friends to join them for dinner at an authentic South African restaurant in Putney called Chakalaka. Its been there for quite a while now but for some odd reason in all the time I've been wandering the streets of London, I haven't taken the time to visit the establishment and see what its like. Now you know that feeling that you get when you wanna kick yourself for not trying something out ages ago, well yes, that is me right now because OMG!

Chakalaka is situated at 136 Upper Richmond Road in Putney, in simpler terms, you walk out of East Putney Station (District Line, yeah the green one) turn left, walk about 50 paces (100 Marky Mark paces) and its on your right. The decor couldn't be more South African, with a zebra skin across the one wall, African artwork on the walls with little price tags on them, just incase you like one of the pictures and feel the need to take it home with you. Theres a nice big painting of South Africa on the wall marking various terrains and major cities in South Africa, although I have one question I'd like to ask the artist… whats with leaving Maritzburg off the map bru? trust me, its a bigger, better and more important place than Springbok, and that made it onto the map

So anyway, we pulled up a chair and the notably, very friendly and well mannered waiter asked us if we'd like any drinks. So the Jen ordered her usual coke and I thought well since I'm at a Saffa jol, I'll go for the original Dutchman Lager, so I ordered a Castle Now one thing I noticed is that in the past when I've ordered  a Castle here in London, is that you'll notice on the bottle that its actually made here in the UK and a few people have said that you can taste the difference, however the bottle of Castle that the waiter placed in front of me was definitely imported direct from SA. The reason I know this is because there was a competition on it to win R10 000 Already I was impressed, because it looks like Chakalaka are trying to be as authentic as possible and they seem to be firmly sticking to that rule, which does say something.

We had a look at the menu and this is when your mind starts chugging away into an endless loop of indecisiveness because if it were possible, I would have said to the waiter, please could I have the entire menu on one plate, because everything on the menu just sounds too good! EISH! The prices are a little above average however there is a very valid reason for this, their steaks are not tough tasteless UK steaks, as stated on their menu, their steaks are imported directly from Namibia from organic grass fed cows and extra matured, so you are getting the real deal. Now as my eyes went down the menu nearing the bottom, looking crazy eyed and dribbling on the table I noticed something that caused my eyes to go into missile lock… I was sold…. This my friends, was the Chakalaka Steak Challenge… 25 ounces (708 grams) of succulent tender juicy full flavoured African steak, topped with my sauce of choice, Monkey Gland sauce, with roast potatoes on the side for 25 pont, and if you clean the plate within 25mins they give you a free T-shirt.

So after ordering we sat patiently waiting while I sipped on my refreshing dutchman lager. Before the food came out we were served with little bread rolls and butter along with a round of Springboks to wet the appetite. A few minutes later the alarm bell went off when I heard the waiter calling in close proximity, "25oz Steak Medium Well!" The time had come, it  was here… now I feast!

As the plate was placed in front of me I gazed down completely mesmerized while the awesome smell flowed through my sinuses completely hypnotising my mind, I could have sworn I heard a sweet siren calling, "eat me Marky, EAT ME!" Now there is one thing I really need to note here, I have never in my entire life had such a thickly sliced piece of cow on my plate, this was one monster steak, and it was mine, all mine! And so I was off, I chomped through that thing like a savage, packing it in like a defrosted caveman who hasn't eaten for 2000 years. Another notable point is that I don't know about you guys, but this is the first time I have found steak served with Monkey Gland sauce in London, it was unbelievable, the tenderness fully lived up to the saying, "like a hot knife through butter", the juicy flavour was something I didn't think actually existed in London, I felt as if I was sitting in a restaurant in SA because it tasted exactly like that and I klaared that plate stukkend in 20mins flat. This meal was absolutely worth every penny and as the saying goes, I'll put my c..k on a block and say you will be unbelievably impressed. Take it from me, I wouldn't be sitting here writing a 922 word story about me chomping a piece of steak if I didn't think it was THAT GOOD! Not to mention that the service is not something you'd normally get in your average London suburb, the waiting staff are extremely on the ball and the manager is not hiding in a corner somewhere waiting for something to go wrong, throughout the evening I noticed he was at the fore front and had full control of his jol making sure that everything is running 100%. 

Check the bad boy in the pic below, and I don't mean me, I mean the steak

Check out Chakalaka's website here for more details

Just wanna say a big cheers to everyone at Chakalaka for an awesome evening, keep up the excellent work. You guys definately made a huge impression!

- Marky Mark

Durban Curry Night at Down South is a winner!

So I checked Down South were advertising dis Durban Curry Night on a Wednesday an all right, £5 for a schweet dish of proper Durban curry and they even throw in a dop of your choice, no word of a lie right. So you know I schmaak a schweet deal when I see one, so I tjooned the Jen, “Hey unty, we going for a curry!” So we hopped into the Black Mamba, slammed on the gas and with a squealing wheel spin, off we tjooned it to this place in Southfields called Down South. ey I slipped the black mamba straight into one parking with total perfection even Clarkson would have been impressed, the Jen battering an eyelid with a sigh of satisfaction in admiration with how smoothly I handled it. We walk in the door and straight away I smell the sweet scent of salvation, I thought to myself…you, me, we gonna dine tonight! So we pull up a seat at a table, the Jen sits down comfortably while I slouch in the chair checking da ou’s checking my cherry with one gleaming eye, and with one stare down an a nod, deez ou’s know I’m da man, no gold tooth required.

So we order two dishes of lamb fantasia, along with a coke for the Jen and ofcourse for me, one ‘Can of the Best’ and I don’t mean Castrol GTX right, I mean the schweet smooth taste of Jack and Coke. Popped a £10 over like I’ll never miss it thinking to myself, ey men, dis is one schweet fuggin deal right. Now before I arrived, I heard deez rumours that Baas Jannie that cooks the curry, is a bit of a Curry Koning, so I tjoon myself, okee I check dis rabble rowser, we’ll see about that.

A few minutes later Baas Jannie himself brings over two full plates of lekker Durban Curry steaming in all its glory, and with a smell that brought one fuggin tear to my eye from the flashbacks which made me reminice of days back home in shit-hot sunny Durban. Ey so I check dis out ekse, make a full one eye shut inspection and think okee, lets chow! So I dip my fork in one tender piece of lamb and place this succulent ting in my mouth. I tink to myself, now for the Fai$al test… one chew, two chew, gone! Passed with flying colours just like Fai$al’s VW 3.2l EOS at 155mph. EISH! this was good! Now let me tell you one ting right, when dis touches your lips you jus can’t blerrie stop. In just a bit longer than a GTi down a quarter mile I klaared that plate flat. Ey I check the Jen, packing that curry in like a savage, and no word of a lie right, if the Jen schmaaks the curry, then you got to obey because this rare moment is more valuable than the one time banging Rockford Fosgate super sound system in Fai$al’s cab right.

I have to admit, dis fuggin Durban Curry is the shit and for only 5 bucks its even better shit right… an with a free dop…Priceless! Gonna be back next week and also probably take Huncle for a taste of heavenly satisfaction.
One important ting though lani’s, Baas Jannie’s curry is becoming quite popular, so I found out tonight that if you gonna go and get a taste of home, make sure you give dem a call before you go so they can save you some, cause that fuggin pot goes down quicker than a fuggin M3 hauling ass down a strip okee.

I just wanna tjoon one more ting okee, Baas Jannie is a champion curry koning, no word of a lie right!

While you dere, check out the dop specials they ave over the weekend, you’ll be fuggin amazed right!

Down South Bar and Lounge

Tel: 020 878 82363

90 Inner Park Road, SW19 6DA

- Marky Mark